A little about me...
My name is Harlow.
As you can see, I’m no stranger to drinking establishments. My loyal human subjects, a band of merry fools, drag me unceremoniously to all sorts of places unfit for a canine of my stature. Come rain or shine, sleet or snow! These poor souls have no sense, so I’m forced to be their guiding light. Hoisted up to the bar, sat upon my own royal perch, I slap down my paw demanding service. I bark orders and everyone obeys. It’s exhausting at times, being the only one in the room whose IQ is higher than a barstool, but some dog has to do it.
Naturally, this talent makes me the perfect Spokesdog. My picture on a beer can has a better chance of recognition than on a milk carton. What better role model than an experienced bar hopper who keeps the people in line?